I have recently read a book by Y. B. Gippenreiter «to Communicate with the child. How?». And I liked it so much that I decided to publish it on the blog pages. The book makes us parents to reflect and reconsider their behavior and attitude towards children. Today I present to you the first two lessons from this book
Unconditional acceptance is the principle without the adoption of which all attempts to establish a relationship with the child are unsuccessful.
Of course to adopt a child is to love him not for what he’s handsome, smart, capable, successful, etc. and just like that, just for what he is!
Parents say: “If you’re good, I’ll love you”. Or: “I won’t feel good until you don’t …(to be lazy, to fight, to be rude), starts …(good grades, help around the house)”.
In these statements directly inform the child that it is taken CONDITIONALLY, that his love or will love, “ONLY IF …”. Conditional, evaluative attitude toward man is characteristic of our culture. It is embedded in the minds of children.
The reason the estimated relationships in the belief that REWARDS AND PUNISHMENT are the main educational tools. But there is a pattern here:
More than child abuse, the worse it becomes
Why is this happening? But because child rearing Continue reading